I’m actually a decent human being. Quite funny. Somewhat intelligent. Relatively competent. Regarding soulful connections – I was totally committed to the dynamic and union of love and commitment. Perhaps not a sexual dynamo, but I do believe I could bring pleasure to a genuine amorous equation – my active imagination and libido would certainly suggest so. There had to be more happiness in life than rainy day carnitas tacos on homemade tortillas with fresh guac after digesting half a bag of gummies. Followed by a visit to Pornhub and a long, lazy nap. What societal counsel determined that the latter was my destiny, and to simply make peace with my minimized (hah!) options?

 You ain’t special – join the rest of us. You fucking loser!