I Was

I felt I was. Before. A man.

Pinched my skin.

Alive. Living. Feeling.

A journey.

I was Man. Now a broken shell. If that.

She asked how I felt, but I struggled to answer.

How to explain what was witnessed. Or what had been done. Reconcile the knowledge; lives were taken. And what have my actions have taken from me?

All the lessons preached regarding morality and brotherhood. The notions of love, unity, even blessings of progeny. There’s nothing sensical to justify the machinations of war and bloodshed. Choosing sides to justify then the barbarous actions. Decided by Man. The all knowing one. Or few. Who deemed them worthy of such power? And ignorance?

Survival is not a reward. My soul has vanished. Along with my capacity to understand the human condition. We are mere vicious animals in a fabricated society of supposed culture. There is no humanity. We don’t belong here. I surely don’t. I long for this next chapter. Unsure yet.

I fear nothing but myself. My reflection.

I’m ready.